Friday, October 10, 2008

It's times like these...

I really thought long and hard about whether or not to post this. I don't want this to turn into a "pity-party or poor me" post but I needed to share some experiences that I have had.

In August we found out that we were having a baby. We were scared (5 kids!!) but SO excited. We waited a while and then told a few people, mainly friends and family.

Last Friday we went for our 12 week and to hear our lil' baby's heartbeat and found out then that we had lost our baby. It was hard and I cried (a lot) that weekend. It was a shock because I had had no signs of mis-carriage. We had to deliver some heart breaking news to some devastated big sisters-to-be. Then we had to contemplate a tough decision- whether to wait for nature to take it's course or to have a D&C. Now like I said, I am not sharing this because I want your sympathy but more to share what I learned.

In the hours, days and time that passed, our family was the recipient of so many blessings, phone calls of support and love and visits "just to see if we needed anything". Love came so strongly that I can't tell you what it meant to us. Justin and I have always felt that we have been very blessed by way of our family and friends and the support that they give to us but we now know what a true blessing they are to us. We are so very grateful.

As the time came to decide what we were to do I had a very special blessing given to me. I was surrounded by family and could feel the prayers that had been said in my behalf.

Yesterday I had the D&C. It was scary and not something that I would ever like to do again but I can already tell that I am healing. It is still hard to think that we no longer get a new baby in April but it is easier with the love that I have been shown. It is not easy for me to accept this much help. I told Justin that I didn't know what I would have done with out it and he said that we are lucky to have such great family and friends. I agree- Thanks to all of you who have been there to help me and my family in our time of need. We love you all.

8 comments:

Bristy said...

Jill, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It plain just sucks for a while, I know. You wish you could just see that crystal ball and what it all means later. Please call if you need anything.
Bristy

Shelly said...

You must be getting a lot of calls because I've tried calling you (house line) and keep getting busy signals. I'll try again tomorrow. I didn't find out until Earlier this week when I talked to Jan. Totally stinks. I'm so sorry. I'll call and chat with you later....long distance hug.

Jen said...

Jill, If I can do anything please let me know. I had no idea that this happened until now. You are in our prayers, and if I can take your kids or you need food brought in, I would be more than happy to help. Love you Guys!!

nana and papa said...

SO SORRY JILL, I KNOW HOW ROUGH IT IS. I HAD 6 MISCARRIAGES BEFORE MIKE AND CHRIS AND ONE AFTER. MY MOM ALWAYS TOLD ME THIS WAS GODS WAY WHEN SOMETHING WASN'T RIGHT. YOU HAVE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL FAMILY. LOVE TO YOU, JUSTIN AND KIDS. NANA AND PAPA LOBDELL

Hogan Family said...

Jill, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. You are in our prayers. I went through the same thing some months ago so I know what your feeling. It stinks. Lots of love.

Anonymous said...

George and I didn't even know you guys were pregnant....we are so sorry, Jill. Our hearts, hugs, and warm wishes go out to you and Justin. This is a tough time--we hope you can feel all the love that surrounds you....don't be afraid to lean on it. We love you both.
Christy

jennie said...

Jilly, you know I love you. remember how misery loves company? I'm still up for the talking MEXICAN dogs if you are!

Lora said...

Sorry to hear about what you are going through! I have been there before and know just how it feels. Thinking of you and wishing you the best! You have such a cute family!!!